Should I post this?

I had planned on showing you my new denim romper I wore on Thursday afternoon, but after discovering an online article I was mentioned in on Jezebel.com all my posting plans shifted to this.

It was basically talking about how perfectionist fashion/craft/diy bloggers make other people in the real world feel inadequate and how their seemingly perfect, romanticized lives only hinder the self esteems of their readers. While I was flattered to be mentioned amongst the "Marthette's" of our generation, the recognition only felt like a backhanded compliment by the end of the comment section. To be fair, not all the comments were negative by any means, most of the women actually defended the creative outlet that is made possible by the blogging community (including the author, in some aspects), but for the most part, the negative comments are what stuck out to me.

While I can definitely sympathize with what the author's saying-- I mean hello, do you know how I feel every time I visit Tavi's blog-- I don't agree with the feeling of inadequacy. The point of this community is to inspire! A year and a half ago I was just another girl in the world who went shopping at the mall and watched a whole lot of nonsense television, but girls like Rhiannon and Jennifer inspired me to seek out the beautiful places in my community. I can't tell you how many times I've felt a bit of envy whenever Erin tweets about her new purchases or when Carrie makes another jaw dropping movie, but I don't turn that into inadequacy, instead I use Erin's looks as inspiration to go find something at Goodwill and I use Carrie's inspiration to go out and make my own movies. I've built collages because of this girl, I've made hair bows because of this girl, and I've explored abandoned buildings because of this girl. This community has helped me to evolve into the girl that I always wanted to be.

Sure, I'll admit, a lot of my photos are a bit of a performance (I've told you a million times how much I enjoy storybooks and childhood characters), but that's just the point of my blog. I don't care if your a president, a princess, a top fashion blogger, or a factory worker, life is life..... is life..... is life..... is life. No one's life is perfect no matter how much it may seem that way from their blog. I have bad skin and a dirty house. I get in tiffs with my boyfriend, and I have my fair share of financial issues; problems are by no means absent from my life, and that's why I use this blog as an escape from the real world. It may be a bit romanticized and unrealistic, but that's just the way I want it. It's my fairy tale. My daydream.

Just to prove how not-so-perfect my life really is, have a look around my dirty house. You know why it's dirty? Because I'd rather go take photos and make silly movies than clean it.

Oh look, it's beenie weenies running down the side of the pan. And yes, all of those dishes are dirty.

new purchases/sale stuff/my never-ending stack of stuff to deal with.

My boyfriends pile of clothes that have been present since we moved in a year ago. As much as I want to, I'm not allowed to touch them because "he knows where everything is".

My messy work station and heaping pile of shoes waiting around since my canceled shoot last Sunday.

Oh and look, there's me with wet hair, glasses, and no makeup.

While my house isn't always this dirty (I'm a little embarrassed here), it's not necessarily ever 100% clean either. I can only hope I didn't gross you out too much with my far-from-perfect life, I just wanted you guys to see that I'm human.

This all just reminds me of an article I read in an issue of Allure a couple years back. I'm pretty sure it was titled "The Other Women", and it was centered around a middle aged, lonely women visiting another country and longing to meet some sort of companion. She met a guy at a bar one night and enjoyed several hours of conversation and laughter over a couple rounds of cocktails. He invited her to continue hanging out with him for the rest of the evening, but she reasonably declined in order to finish her work by the deadline. He was a nice guy but not someone she could foresee spending the rest of her life with. To make a long story short, the next morning she went walking on the beach and from a distance saw a beautiful and joyous couple walking her way. She was immediately envious of this other women and her seemingly perfect relationship, but once she got a little closer she realized that the guy walking beside her was the same guy she shared drinks with the night before. She realized then and there that she could have been the other women and that she just didn't choose to be.

All that said, it's easy to look in on someone else' life and think it's perfect, but don't ever let that make you feel inadequate. Please, let that inspire you! All you can do is find a way to be happy with yourself.

don't dream it. be it.

Hopefully this didn't come off as mean or pompous because that is in no way how I intended it. Thanks to all my new followers for taking an interest in my blog and all my old friends for sticking with me for this long. I'll be back to my usual postings tomorrow. :)


Rosie said...

Girl, you're awesome. I'm so pleased that you have an opinion and you are sticking with it. I often find myself struggling with perfectionism, I find myself looking at other people's blogs and I get jealous. Thanks for reminding me that nobody is perfect!

Fabiola "Fab" said...

YOu're wonderful inside and out! Glad that I have found your blog and you! I also suffer from bad skin and dirty house etc. It's just part life!

Love always,

Fabiola "Fab"

Barbro Andersen said...

Thank you for writing this, I think it's important to remember that no one is perfect and that a blog really is an extended and glorified version of a pretty normal life :)

I loved this post - your honesty is really admirable.

Desiree said...

Thank you. This was awesome. I love your blog because it is an escape. Now I love it even more because you're so real and grounded. You're just great!

Justice Pirate said...

I love that you are so realistic and are willing to show it too. I think that every blogger has imperfections and things that are secretive and problematic.

I'd clean your house for you if I lived nearby. I clean my parents' house for them every week. . .I clean my place too much. It might be an OCD that i have without realizing it (according to Rob).

You look so cute even without make up and with wet hair and glasses. You look almost like a different person, but you are still gorgeous!!

I think it is better for people to be inspired by bloggers than by a lot of famous people in the entertainment world!


muchlove said...

well I know one thing that's good about that article is that it lead me to you and your blog!

This is really great post, and you've just articulated my exact thoughts. That article has been on my mind all day, and I hate that. I hate that it actually made me feel self conscious and even GUILTY about what I post. I've always viewed blogs as a source of inspiration. Sure, I've envied other blogger's from time to time, but never to a point where it hindered my self esteem! I don't know what they expect us to do - post terrible photos everyday just to make them feel better?

Tess said...

First, let me say that my name is Tess and you probably don't know me! I've been on flickr as simpletess (www.flickr.com/photos/simplemoth) for some time now and finally made the plunge into the blog world and the world of "here's the pretty things in my life and some vintage clothes" under this new name.

Anyways, I put it off for so long for the exact reasons that you discourage in this entry. I have to say this is probably the best blog entry I've read in quite some time. I can't say much else other than I truly appreciate it.

BaronessVonVintage said...

I'm so glad you posted this and thanks for drawing my attention to the Jezebel article. I wholeheartedly agree with you about blogging. It seems to me that there are competitive, covetous, insecure, and jealous people in the world, both off and online (I could go on and on about where I think this behaviour tends to come from, especially among women, but that's another rant for another day). In my opinion, I don't think blogging necessarily needs to be blamed for causing such behaviours. I think it has to do with the mindset with which readers of blogs approach the content they view. If people can get beyond their own narcissistic and competitive tendencies towards seeing blogging as representations of what they don't have or who they are not, I think the blogs and bloggers you've mentioned can be these amazingly wonderful examples of some pretty wonderful messages and ideas, and I just don't think "perfectionism" has ever been one of them. As both a reader and producer of blogs, I can definitely say that blogging has been one of the most positive and empowering experiences of my life. I think the really great women like the ones you mentioned provide much more positive role models and possibilities and inspiration, than most of the notions of identity, femininity, etc, that women (young women especially) get through other mainstream media. Which outlet has more toxic ideologies: Blogging, with its community filled with people who tend more towards DIY, reusing rather than filling the landfill with more junk produced by multinational corporations (via vintage, for example), encouraging self-expression and creativity through visual and verbal means, embodying unique and un-plastic surgeried images of femininity....or the Hollywood obsessed, patriarchal, hypersexualized status driven mainstream media? You can probably guess my answer to that question.

Cassandra said...

I've never commented before, but I follow your blog and I absolutely love it. I have no idea what their talking about, honestly. I find your page beautiful and I *am* a wee bit jealous, but it does not make me feel inadequate in any way. In fact - it's really inspiring for me. I'm a plus sized girl and after reading some of your posts, I felt confident enough to go buy my first vintage dress - which is a hard task for a plus sized girl if she doesn't want to look like she's wearing a circus tent! Anyway - keep up the good work. Your outfits are endlessly inspiring for me.

Nico said...

This was seriously such an amazing post.... I really appreciate how you keep it real. That's what I love about your blog, I gather a sense of truth in your writing that I could relate to. Love it! It's sad how others see these fashion blogs as a fantasy world, but like you said, it's a great place for inspiration!

You still look super pretty with wet hair and no makeup :)


Little Ocean Annie said...

This was so well articulated! Your point of view was anything but pompous. It will always baffle me how many people spend their energy posting negative comments and articles full of backhanded compliments! Most of our blogs ARE an escape from reality, and that's why we love it! It would be silly to take up a hobby that was full of problems and the struggles of real life! keep doing what you do, we'll keep enjoying it and feel inspired (not inadequate)!

anita said...

I agree completely and it was funny to see your ugly-you, hahaha, I wouldn't have managed to be so brave. You are a great inspiration for me. Xx

Victoria India said...

You still look amazing btw!

It's always lovely seeing what other people do with their houeses, i understand the mess. I live with 4 other girls, just imagine how messy that is!

Q's Daydream said...

your the best!!! i can't wait to meet you and all of you quirkiness...and boy oh boy I hope I don;t scare you away with mine! lol ;o)

Katy said...

Thanks for this post. I've never commented, but I've read your blog for a while, and saw the Jezebel post independently. You managed to articulate some of the responses I had to the post better than I could. Though I don't have my own, reading DIY/vintage blogs has made a great difference in my life--I feel more inspired and readier to learn and experiment with crafty things than I was before, and this has really done nothing but good for me. You're awesome--keep doing what you do!

Juliette said...

Thank you for posting this. It was sincere and thoughtful and it was brave of you to show us your "less than perfect" side, it makes you human.
I admit, I get jealous reading about the parties and vacations other girls go on and the designer clothes they wear. However, like yourself, I also get inspired by their blogs and use that inspiration to buy clothes on a Goodwill budget.
Thank you for sharing.

-Juliette WhereForArtThouRomeo

calivintage said...

ah, this is what my apartment looks like!! i too prefer to focus on putting together outfits and taking photos and writing blog posts over actual housekeeping!

(and shopping. sorry!!!)

sarah louise said...

What a refreshing post, I love it. I always enjoy when bloggers write about why they blog, and I don't find this entry catty at all. I love how real your blog is; it's personal and accessible at the same time and you should be proud of that. I'm sorry people have shot you down, but I think all bloggers I admire have faced some weird criticism at one point or another. A lot of it is people being jealous and not turning that into positive energy or inspiration.

It's also so great that you paid tribute to all of those who have inspired you! And you've inspired me, too. Love your blog, keep up the great work. <3

Sarah Louise

Lisa said...

I try to keep my house somewhat tidy but I'm pretty messy naturally so it is controlled chaos. It is funny because I do feel I am not living to the standard but like you said there is so many other amazing things to be doing. I do feel the standard should vary. Glad to know I'm not the only person who doesn't dust every other day:) Lame about those comments, I think that just comes with the territory of being more well known. but from jezebel? haterz.

Maya Tara Credico said...

house cleaning party!

Sally Jane Vintage said...

Well said! Your blog is very inspiring to me as well!

rachel / Red Lips Vintage said...

you're so cool! everything you've said makes perfect sense and is exactly what i need to hear sometimes!

rachel / Red Lips Vintage said...

you're so cool! everything you've said makes perfect sense and is exactly what i need to hear sometimes!

Charlotte. said...

this is beautiful.
i love your inspirational posts.

Ulrika said...

Totally agree with everything, well done, ur such an inspiration! And you look absolutely darling in your coke t-shirt!xxx

Amanda said...

This is a great post because it aired out a lot of things that need to be said. And your glasses are adorable, you should use them in a post!

I have a vendetta against folding laundry. And the goo on the side of pots and pans in my sink is mac n'cheese residue. Oh, glamour!

If you ever want a break from daily life - you're welcome to visit Austin

Amanda said...

To answer the title of your post, yes you should definitely have posted this. I'm really glad you linked to that article. I'm not sure I even understand where the writer and negative commenters are coming from. I think the only time I've felt inadequate when looking at a blog is when I want something but can't afford it...and even then it's not the blogger's fault, but the fact that I have horrible money skills. If some blogs make readers feel inadequate, why would they keep coming back and reading in the first place? That's asking for problems.
I mean, I consider my blog partly fashion and partly personal. But why would I take pictures of my messy room or write about every single problem I experience in life on it? Those things should be kept private. To me, my blog is about the good things in my life and the things I enjoy, and I expect that's how it is for other bloggers too. As a reader, I prefer to here about what makes my favorite bloggers happy and all the positive things. So of course, some things are a little bit romanticized, but I'm fully aware that there life isn't perfect.

I dunno if my comment made any sense at all, but I think you said it all in your post Starr and of course, I still love your blog even if your home is messy and you aren't wearing makeup!

Jessica / Lola Vintage Clothing said...

One of the best posts I've read in a while! So glad I follow you. Just shared this on twitter, I like it so much :)

Jessica / Lola Vintage Clothing said...

p.s. brave girl for showing your messes. I'm the SAME WAY. I'd so much rather be doing what I love to do than worrying about housework.

Anonymous said...

Hi Starr,

Thanks for your thoughtful post as always. I read that article too (one of my best friends writes for Jezebel! but she didn't write that article,) and the thing that struck me as the most interesting about that article was the author's willingness to admit her own envy and sense of inadequacy. I think one of the things that happened after I started blogging with Meggy on FFW is that I realized how much of blogging is fantasy and performance and how pleasurable that can be, and maybe for those reasons it's easier for me to look at other blogs through the same lens and understanding of fantasy and performance. It's almost like visiting your friends when they are trying to be the best self they can be! And I love your best self--it's romantic and thoughtful and articulate and creative and beautiful and always, always humble.

xo Jenny

Jenni said...

To say I love this post would be an understatement. That Jezebel piece left me scratching my head. There are those blogs out there that can be a little Martha-esque, and I'll admit that there have been the occasional posts that make me mourn my dumpy, boring lifestyle, but I think the author refutes her own point with her romanticized images: with the right camera angle and lighting, anyone can make their life look glamorous! There's a reason why you don't normally post pictures of your sink (which, I am comforted to know, looks exactly like mine!) and why I crop encroaching piles of dirty clothes out of outfit pictures. These blogs are celebrations of the good in people's lives, and they are an inspiration! They show us how good life can be, even for regular people, and teach us to see the what's good and special in every day events like getting dressed or eating a good meal.

Anyway, thanks for posting this, thanks for showing your less glamorous side (seriously--this could be my house!), and thanks just in generally for being awesome! :D :D :D

Amelia said...

this was such an interesting post, and i completely agree with you. i've only just started really reading blogs and of course having my own co-owned blog, and i have never felt in any way inadeaquate because of other blogs. Inspired, yes, jealous, from time to time. But the good kind of jealous, the I want to do something cool like that, to make something as lovely as that, to wear clothes as frightfully wonderful as that. Anyway, the only person that makes one feel inadequate is oneself.
Moreover, all of life is a part performance anyway. What's more real? homemade or vintage and carefully selected outfits on blogs, or being told what to wear by a media focused on controlling what beauty looks like (by models who have had their real selves airbrushed out of them). I know which I prefer!
and i love your coke t-shirt!

from amelia of la ville inconnue

Maria Confer said...

I love that you touched on this subject. I'm a bit appalled by the Jezebel article and comments. Don't people realize that we put time and effort into our shoots to make them look the way they do. Do they think the same thing about fashion magazines and runway shows? Because we're just doing the same thing, but on a smaller level.

I don't think I've ever been as happy as I am now doing my blog. It motivates me to try everyday, to explore, to create and most importantly to appreciate myself.

Maybe those negative people need to find something like that in their lives if they're so miserable and envious.

Love you Starr!

Lulu Letty

Modesty is Pretty said...

I just quite don't understand why girls say they get jealous I just don't. I mean of course everyone has problems, and like you said blogs are to inspire, not to make us feel bad about ourselves. I think jealousy is a horrible feeling and I feel bad for the ones who feel that way. I love your blog and I think you are very talented taking pictures. =) God bless.

wishwishwish said...

oh thats so interesting..it's strange that people feel that way. I too use these beautiful people as inspiration instead of feeling inadequate. Thank you so much for the mention : ) x

moonshinejunkyard said...

hahaha! this is so effing crazy that people choose to feel this way...uh there's a simple solution ladies: if you like it and it makes you feel good, read it, if not, then don't! i didn't read the jezebel article and i'm sort of out of the loop of the whole bloggy/internet fashion thing (for example i only just figured out who tazi is like a month ago) but just do a few posts because i love vintage clothes and selling them on etsy. other than that, blogs just show what you love and enjoy right?! and they should ultimately be for YOU for your own creative expression which means at heart it is only YOURS and be damned with what anyone else thinks it should/should not be. you are certainly not forcing anyone to read this if it happens to bring up negative feelings in any way, which would be ridiculous and i say get a grip girls for giving into jealousy and actually letting that affect you. as a matter of fact i have always appreciated how lovely and unique your images are...not like the norm, not so "picture perfect" in some predictable way but truly beautifully uniquely you. your style is circussy and ragtimey and romantic and old-fashioned and those things are a far cry from what a lot of the US considers "perfect" anyway so where's the quibble here? i LOVE your response to these feelings and right on for defending yourself and marthette is definitely a subtle slur or not so subtle. YOU are an inspiration and you are always honoring others by pointing out your personal influences so just keep doing exactly as you are doing and be you because it is wonderful and human and just right! by the way you are gorgeous without make up and in your glasses. sorry this is so long. you're amazing.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for the post, I too find your honesty refreshing. I didn't like the jezebel article, and her insecurities and hovering negativity are some of the reasons I don't even bother with reading magazine articles anymore, either online or printed, unless they are completely fact-based.

Like you, the whole fashion blogger community is not about competition to me, it is about inspiration, and I actually feel bad for anyone that turns it into a contest because they need therapy or to invest in the most basic self-help books.

What struck me in particular was the Tavi call-out. There are geniuses out there and this girl is one of them; we need to get over it. Honestly I stopped following her because she is too sophisticated for me, and I don't have any problem with admitting that. If blogs make you feel bad, don't follow them. There are a ton out there, popping up every day, it is easy to find people similar to you and make you feel secure and accepted.

Thanks again for the awesome post!

transmission me

Erin said...

I loved this! You put so many of my own thoughts into words. Thank you!

tess said...

oh dear, I have NEVER seen you as pompous. Your blog is NOT and never will be pretentious. I find your blog and many others inspiring, I love your outfits, your fabulous thrifting, great photos, wonderful styling, etc. But I know you're a real person beneath it all and I know that real person isn't perfect, because no one is, and I like that. I definitely do not feel like your blog or any other blog makes my life look bad. If I ever start to doubt myself due to a blog I will probably have to stop blogging entirely, but hopefully that will never happen. The point is, I find the Jezebel post generally rude and the work of a catty woman who justifies her ridiculous insecurities by attacking other women. The comments are even worse actually, I was a bit offended by the girl who quipped that her mother told her that if she ever wanted to photograph her shoes, she should volunteer instead...ugg. anyway, love your blog, keep doing what you're doing!

Emma Clark said...

I love your blog and I love the blogging community. As someone starting out in this area, I love the inspiration, support and sharing that happens.

The problem with putting anything out there is that you can never know how people will react and some people will always react negatively. Fortunately they are in the minority.

Keep blogging and we'll keep following. :-)

Anonymous said...

I will go ahead and admit that I occasionally straddle the line bewteen inspired and jealous. But ya know what, that's my problem! The last thing I would want is for any negativity on my part (however small it usually is) to alter or stop the predominantly positive expressions fellow bloggers share.

Honestly though, it usually revolves around the act of blogging itself. (Not the lives of the people or their posessions.) I'm jealous of the organization & consistency it takes, the commitment, the focus. Not everyone can pull that off. I am often frustrated over not being able to do it myself, when I really want to, and have for years. I feel like I have a lot to share or express, and to see some people do it so naturally and successfully does rustle up some envy. But like I said, that is my own problem, and it brings about healthy motivation anyway, not feelings of inadequacy!

Anyhoo...I am relatively new to your blog, so I suppose this is a rather long winded Hello!

Anonymous said...

You know something, I don't think people who bitch about personal style blogs ever actually read blogs like yours, you know written by a simple, real girl. Not photoshopped, not thousand dollar couture wearing or professionally photographed. If one ever read the kinds of blogs made by real girls like you Tieka, Rebecca, Elizabeth, Annie, Erin and so many others, then they could never say such things.

But don't you worry about it. We your readers know what you are all about and you are always a wonderful stream of inspiration to us.

:) Love

Sydney said...

I just have to tell you that this is probably one of the most wonderful posts I've read in a long long while...on anyone's blog! Just getting started on my own blog, I definitely have been feeling those inadequate feelings, especially since my apartment looks a lot like yours! I'd rather be creative and venture out than waste time cleaning up, as sad as that maybe is. It's comforting and wonderful to read your post and see that you feel just as I do, and I look up to you for so much inspiration. Thank you so so much for this post. It means so much to me and many others I'm sure!!! ^.^ We girls are just as beautiful in our natural, messy surroundings with no makeup and soft backlighting! :D

Sydney P.

Harlow Darling said...

How very silly, you know, that does make my blood boil...ugh!
How dare people say such unfair things, it's like they don't see the effort you and other tallented bloggers go to! I mean gosh, you go to so much effort to come up with the most perfect little outfits for yourself and your models (outfits that are so craftily put together, not to mention are affordable for the real people out there who can't afford to throw thousands of dollars at designers)and then you also take so much time to get photos just right and gorgeous everytime you do a post, you deserve a medal or some sort of trophy as do other bloggers like you!

I think one must be a very pathetic foolish person to think that girls like you and Rhiannon are going out of your way to make others feel "inadequate" (what horseshit!)and jealous, what damn nonsense! Before I discovered your blog I was a big fan of Rhiannon's blog and reading it used to be such a treat, it didn't make me feel sad about my life, it made me feel inspired to seek out nice places to explore and be more daring with what I wore.

Darling you are a fantastic fashion, photography and blogging inspiration and reading your posts is as wonderful as digging into an ice cream sunday with all of the trimmings, it always puts a smile on my face and makes me feel warm and fuzzy :)

Lots of love and hugs <3

Jasmine said...

i loved this post! i totally agree that it's not a feeling of inadequacy perse, but it's more of wishful-lust-turned-inspiration :) blogging really is an escape from everyday life and i love it :) you're amazing! now i can't wait to see that denim romper!

Andi B. Goode said...

If girls look at fashion magazines, etc. and feel inadequate I get a little angry because those magazines are designed to sell an unattainable image.
If girls look at other girls' blogs and feel inadequate, I feel a little sad, yeah, but the aim of a blogger is not to sell (generally - one person is not an industry, such as the fashion magazine) - it should be to inform, to inspire or even just to share.
I also would love to see more bloggers do themed posts of the imperfect parts of their lives!!
-Andi x
PS And, yes, of course no one's life is perfect. But the sort of blogs the article addresses post about the good, fun, creative, inspiring parts of their lives! It's their point. A director doesn't make a movie and think 'Well, I'd better leave all of the boring, insignificant parts in so that other artists don't feel inadequate when they watch it'.

Rose said...

Really well said Starr. It is very true that people only show the best of themselves through their blog. Good on you for showing your dirty dishes and piles of laundry :) Im sure not one person would think less of you, if anything its only made you more of an inspiration to us.
Hope youre having a fun weekend!


Shallow Mallow said...

Great post. I couldn't agree more and couldn't help but giggle at the "he knows where everything is" pile.

My husband used to have one of those but somehow we have swapped roles over time and now it is my laundry dotted all over the place like it has been shot from a cannon. Never mind though, I know where everything is. ;-)

Manja said...

Well said! I totally agree with you! I mean, if I look at your blog or other wonderful blogs out there, it definitely seems like some kind of perfect fairy tale world but, I think, actually believing that would be very naive because no one has a perfect life. Blogs like yours or Rhiannon's are definitely not robbing me of my self-confidence but to me, they are a source of inspiration to make my blog better :)

Rebeccak said...

Hmmm... that article seems rather silly to me. If you choose to feel inadequate everytime you see someone doing a good job of something, life would be rather dreary? Do you think Sadie Stein goes to the ballet, then curses herself for her inability to stand on point?

I think you have it right - I find your blog a great inspiration! Keep it up.

Robin said...

This is the best, most wonderful post I have read in my year and half of blog Obsessing, thrift loving lifestyle! thanks for speaking yoru mind!!!!

Anonymous said...

lovely post, good on you for speaking your mind! I agree that often I read blogs and wish I could be as cool as them, but it encourages me to be my own unique self - and that can only be a good thing!

marisa said...

You are so amazing and you inspire me everytime I see you!

Anonymous said...

Pfffffft. It DOES take effort and resources to be good at ANYTHING, including fashionblogging, and the writer is merely jealous that you (and others) have applied yourself to good results. To be sure it's not anyone's fault if they are unable to put forth the effort, but that is absolutely no excuse to throw mud on you and your hard work. Screw 'em and keep on looking good and doing good.

Meghan said...

Such a great post, lady. To me, inspiration is found everywhere--nature, books, music, people, animals, thrift stores and of course, in blogs like yours. Thank you for honestly sharing parts of your life that aren't fairy tale. It's common sense that even the most "perfect" bloggers have them, but it was a very forthright to put it out there as you did. Props, girl. Keep on keeping on.

Lemondrop Marie said...

It took me three days recently to clean my closet and I haven't started on the laundry room (totally scared)
Love that you shared this.

Marie @ Lemondrop ViNtAge

princesspolitico said...

that's it.
your readers love you. you were one of the first blogs i read that inspired me to continue posting - even when no one comments or you feel silly looking back a couple days later. your blog is YOUR blog and i'll keep visiting as long as you keep posting.


a cat of impossible colour said...

Hi Starr!

I was one of the blogs linked in that article too (apparently she thinks New Zealand is exotic!). I have been trying to ignore it and avoid the comments, because I found they were putting me off blogging altogether. I hated to think that my blog was being interpreted as 'showing off' to make other people feel inadequate. Anyway, I agree with all the comments above, and I know just how you feel.

A xx

SJ said...

i'm so glad you posted this. i think it's really easy to read other people's blogs and think their life seems a lot more fabulous than yours but it's not like you're going to post the boring or dull parts of your life now is it?!
thanks for your honesty and the pics. i think you've stated what a lot of people in the blog world think!

Gaby and Jane said...

Just want to say - I LOVE THIS!

I actually had the biggest grin on my face when I saw that pile of dirty dishes haha

Such a poignant, positive and wonderful post.

Well done!!

Gaby xoxo

Ondo Lady said...

Well I am really glad that Jezebel wrote that post because it brought me to some wonderful blogs that I would not have come across otherwise. I love Jezebel but you got to admit they do take snarkiness to another level. You do not need to justify yourself in anyway, we need Martharette blogs like yours to remind us of how beautiful our world is and also to inspire us to be more creative.

Sandra said...

Many girls are indeed wasting their opportunity to be themselves, because they try to copy other successful and in their eyes ‘perfect’ girls. They blindly absorb their style and behavior right up to their thoughts, instead of discovering their own opinion, passion and voice; because they think they are not good enough. Many become jealous, because they are scared, which results from a lack of self-esteem and a lack of trust in themselves and what they are doing. This obtains for the real world as well as for the fashion blogger world. First and foremost new female bloggers copy the content of other long-established and successful blogs; because they see what these girls are doing must be perfect, because it works out. But instead of thinking ‘why is she successful’ or ‘why is she so perfect’ they should switch into ‘what could be possible if I be myself and do what I want to do’. The first secret of success is to believe in yourself. I think, as Tavi started two years ago she didn’t thought about what others will think about her or her blog, she just did what she enjoyed and shared this with the world, and exactly that’s why she became so successful and not because she is oh so perfect. No one is!

Clare said...

So I know I'm a little late to the party, but I wanted to jump in here and add my little bit of support. This is a beautiful post, and I think that it really gets to the heart about what makes blogging so incredible. I've never in my life met and known so many women who are truly so supportive of each other, and derive so much inspiration from the others' creativity.

I really don't have many words to express right now, because you've really said it so beautifully. Thanks for this post, and thanks for all the inspiration you've given us all with your lovely daydream posts and gorgeous photoshoots. :)

Anonymous said...

thanks for this. :)

Rachel said...

Hi! this is the first post I've read of yours - Caitlin (Waking Life) linked to you - and I'm so impressed that I'm following you now!

Thank you for this post. I've only been reading fashion blogs for a few months, but I've been immensely inspired to the point that my self-esteem has risen as much as my personal style has developed. You guys - Caitlin, Erin of Work
With What You've Got, Hillary of byhillary, Sal of Always Pretty and Kim of Fab Finds under $50 among others - have helped me have a new outlook on Thrifting, DYI and reworking clothing combos to make my current wardrobe stretch. Are there times that I pull up someone's post and the photos make me go "I want that!!" YES, but I have yet to feel intimidated or sef-conscience by what any of you have posted. I usually feel completely inspired, uplifted and ready for a fashion challenge! You ladies have also given me a fresh perspective on fashion itself, where as Elle and Vogue leave me feeling poor and unworthy of great clothing. It wonderful to see that real women can be beautiful, fashionable and intelligent and share it with the world unabashedly. Keep it up!

Missa said...

Just wanted to give you a little virtual pat on the back for this and say... here! here! So, so well said :)

The Body Electric said...

THAT'S MY HOUSE!!!! Seriously! I feel the same way, I start getting cleaned up but then I think of something to check on a blog or ebay and get totally distracted from cleaning, why clean up when there are fun things to do. ;-/

Uh oh.

Thanks for making me feel less alone.

Eline said...

Yikes! I hadn't seen that Jezebel article because I stopped reading a couple of months ago, so thank you for linking because this is yet another sign that Jezebel.com can't be called feminist any more. This isn't the only time they've pointed at a kind of woman or one woman n particular and although on the surface it may seem objective the articles always seem to be written with a strange kind of hate and spite and it just points out that Jezebel only accepts a certain kind of woman. Ugh ugh ugh

And have you ever read the comments on a Tavi article? It is absolutely revolting. Things like, 'she looks like a grandma', 'she is ugly' etc. are being written. What is up with that? She's a young girl that's secure about herself, she is creative and she is set on being her own person.

Seriously, how can Jezebel still call itself a feminist blog?

Also I love this post and your photos of the uncleaned corners of your house.

Because of outfit posts I've learned to clean more often, but I am still lazy and even somewhere on my blog photos you can see some underwear laying right in some corner or whatever hah.